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I enjoy the space between Christmas and New Years. Calm is in the air. People are no longer frantic to get it all done. The rush quotient has gone way down. Ahhh, some breathing space.
Cheryl Richardson reminds us, "This is the time of year when the world quiets down a bit and we get the space to do some of the things we've wanted to do. I hope you give yourself that gift. Sleep more if your body needs rest, focus your energy on relaxing rather than getting things done, spend time with people who make you laugh, or find your own new source of joy."
"A new beginning is just around the corner, but let's allow the ending to have its day. "
These things can be easier said than done if you are living with someone with autism. Their needs are still there and it may be challenging to make that space for extra breathing. However, sometimes all it takes is intention, and it's amazing what you can create (or squeeze in) for yourself.
And speaking of intention, with the New Year just around the corner, many people are gearing up to write New Year's Resolutions. Personally, I prefer the "intention" vs the "resolution". Resolution is "the action of solving", therefore resolutions tend to focus on problems in our lives that need to be solved. Typically, what is wrong with us, and how can we fix ourselves.
Intention is "the determination to act in a certain way". Intentions are about becoming aware of different ways that you would prefer to be in your life.
Recently, someone introduced me to the idea of ONE WORD intentions. She told me she had picked "less" for herself last year. Less weight, less worrying, less rushing... you get the idea.
I really like the idea of one word. Clean and simple, and potentially very powerful. I just found a great explanation on Christine Kane's blog. (AND, at the same time, I discovered her music as well.)
"The reason most resolutions don’t work is that they address only one
level of your life. The DO level. It’s the DO-HAVE-BE model. “I will DO
this thing.” (i.e., Lose weight) “So I can HAVE this other thing”
(Self-Esteem) and I can BE this thing. (Confident.)
The average New Year’s Resolution doesn’t address the core of the issue – the “BE” level.
The best order for creating positive changes in your life is the
BE-DO-HAVE model. This means you start from the BE level. When you
begin changing on the BE level of your life, then the DO level and the
HAVE level follow more easily.
When you start only on the DO level, then all the blocks on the BE level will often become the obstacles you can’t overcome.
A Better New Year’s Ritual
Several years ago, my friend and I decided that, instead of
making resolutions, we would pick a word that would guide us throughout
the year. It would be our touchstone. It would remind us of living our
lives at the BE level.
This didn’t mean that we didn’t take action. It meant that our
actions were inspired from the BE level. In fact, I took more action
than ever with this new approach!"
BE, DO, HAVE. I really like that!
I invite you to get quiet over the next few days, go within, and pick a word for the year.
Just one word. That’s all.
Then, hold that word in your mind throughout the year, and let your word guide you to take action.
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